| The Sniglet | The Pronunciation | The Definition |
| ABZOT | ab' zaht | The device in a currency changer that determines whether a bill is too wrinkled or not. |
| ACCORDIONATED | ah kor' de on ay tid | Being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time. |
| AEROMA | ayr oh' ma | The odor emanating from an exercise room after an aerobics workout. |
| AEROPALMICS | ayr o palm' iks | The study of wind resistance conducted by holding a cupped hand out the car window. |
| ALPONIUM | al po' nee um | (chemical symbol: Ap) Initial blast of odor upon opening a can of dog food. |
| AMBIPORTALOUS | am bih port' ahl us | Possessing the uncanny knack for approaching a set of double doors and always pushing the locked one. |
| ANACEPTION | an a sep' shun | The body's ability to actually affect television reception by moving about the room. |
| ANTALIXIC | ant a lik' sik | One who passes over licorice jellybeans. |
| ANTICIPARCELLATE | an ti si par' sel ate | Waiting until the mailman is several houses down the street before picking up the mail, so as not to appear too anxious. |
| AQUADEXTROUS | ak wa deks' trus | Possesing the ability to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes. |
| AQUALIBRIUM | ak wa lib' re um | The point where the stream of drinking fountain water is at its perfect height, thus relieving the drinker from (a) having to suck the nozzle, or (b) squirting himself in the eye. |
| ARACHNIDIOT | ar ak ni' di ot | A person, who, having wandered into an "invisible" spider web begins gyrating and flailing about wildly. |
| ATTRINYL | a try' nil | (chemical symbol: At) A black, bulletproof, totally inflexible type of plastic, used primarily in covers of pay phone directories. |
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| BANDILE | ban' dyl | The thin red strip one pulls to release a Band-Aid. |
| BARGARCS | bar' jarks | The streaks on a car's windshield from faulty wipers. |
| BATHQUAKE | bath' kwake | The violent quake that rattles the entire house when the water faucet is turned to a certain point. |
| BEVAMETER | bev' a meet uhr | (a unit of measure) The distance a coaster, attached to the bottom of a wet glass, will travel before it falls back to earth. |
| BLEEMUS | blee' mus | The disgusting film on the top of soups and cocoa that sit out for too long. |
| BLIBULA | blih' byu luh | The spot on a dog's stomach which, when rubbed, causes his leg to rotate wildly. |
| BLINDELIZE | blin' dul eyes | To scratch an album beyond recognition trying to maneuver it over the record spindle. |
| BLITHWAPPING | blith' wap ing | Using anything BUT a hammer to hammer a nail into the wall, such as shoes, lamp bases, doorstops, etc. |
| BLIVETT | blih' vit | To turn one's pillow over and over, looking for the cool spot. |
| BLOTCH | blahch | To slap the bottom of a catsup bottle with increasing intensity, ultimately resulting in BLOTCHSLIDE. |
| BOBBLOGESTURE | bah blo jes' cher | The classroom activity of not knowing an answer but raising one's hand anyway (after dtermining a sufficient number of other people have also raised their hands, thus reducing the likelihood of actually being called on). |
| BOSLUM | bahz' lum | The small metal ring on a ballpoint pen that separates the top half (MELANEXUS) from the bottom half (MOOSTERUS). |
| BOVILEXIA | bo vil eks' e uh | The oncontrollable urge to lean out the car window and yell "Moo!!" every time you pass a cow. |
| BRATTLED | brat' uld | The unsettling feeling, at a stoplight, that the busload of kids that just pulled up beside you is making fun of you. |
| BRIMPLET | brim' plit | A frayed shoelace that must be moistened to pass through a shoe eyelet. |
| BUCKLINT | buck' lint | The fine red and blue threads running through new dollar bills. |
| BUCULETS | buk' u lets | The bumper guards on the underside of a toilet seat. |
| BUMPERGLINTS | bump' ur glintz | The small reflective obstacles in the middle of interstate highways which supposedly keep drivers awake and on track. |
| BURBULATION | ber byu lay' shun | The obsessive act of opening and closing a refrigerator door in an attempt to catch it before the little automatic light comes on. |
| BRUSPLOOT | ber' sploot | To position one's thumb at the end of a garden hose to increase the water pressure. |
| BUSBLENDER | bus' blen dur | The device at the front of the bus that tosses your fare around for awhile, then swallows it. |
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| CABNICREEP | kab' nih kreep | The structural condition in which the closing of one kitchen cabinet causes another to open. |
| CAREENA | ka reen' uh | Any mangled or missing piece of highway guard rail. |
| CARPERPETUATION | kar' pur pet u a shun | The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance. |
| CEREOALLOCATIVE | ser e o al' o ka tuv | Describes the ability of a seasoned breakfast eater to establish a perfect cereal/banana ratio, assuring there will be at least one slice of banana left for the final spoonful of cereal. |
| CHALKTRAUMA | chawk' traw ma | The body's reaction to someone running his fingernails down a chalkboard. |
| CHARP | charp | The green, mutant potato chip found in every bag. |
| CHEEDLE | chee' dul | The residue left on one's fingertips after consuming a bag of Cheetos. |
| CHINGRIP | chin' grip | Area where chin meet neck. Used for holding pillow when slipping on pillowcase. |
| CHOCONIVEROUS | chahk o niv' ur us | The tendency when eating a chocolate Easter bunny to bite off the head first. |
| CHWADS | chwadz | The small, disgusting wads of chewed gum commonly found beneath table and counter tops. |
| CINEMUCK | si' ne muk | The combination of popcorn, soda, and melted chocolate which covers the floors of movie theaters. |
| CIRCLOCRYOGENIC THEORY | sur klo kri o jen' ik the' uh ree | Postulates that no matter which way you turn a glass of ice water, the cubes will move to the back. (Further research has established that one piece of ice will always stick to the bottom of an empty glass until tapped, at which point it will come forward and smack the drinker on the end of his nose.) |
| CIRCULOIN TECHNIQUE | sur' kew loyn tek neek' | The popular approach to steak dining in which one eats around the edges first, then works his way toward the middle. |
| CLUMFERT | klum' furt | The invisible extra step at the top and bottom of a staircase. Usually materializes when one is carrying a large bag of groceries. |
| COEGGULANT | ko eg' yu lent | The white things in a plate of scrambled eggs. |
| CONAGRAPHS | kohn' a grafs | The raised relief squares on an ice cream cone. |
| CREEDLES | kre' dulz | The colony of microscopic indentations on a golf ball. |
| CRUMMOX | krum' oks | The cereal that gets caught between the inner lining and the side of the box. Also, the leftover amount at the bottom. (Not enough to eat, but too much to throw away.) |
| CURBSWELL | kerb' swel | A seismic condition in which the curb on the passenger side of the car will rise and wedge a car door. The passenger must then climb out and stand on the curb until the swelling goes down. |
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| DASHO | da' show | The area between a car's windshield and dashboard, where coins, pencils, etc. cannot be humanly retrieved. |
| DETERRENCY | de ter' ren see | The ruined currency found in pants pockets after laundering. |
| DETRUNCUS | de trunk' us | The embarrassing phenomemon of losing one's bathing shorts while diving into a swimming pool. |
| DISCONFECT | dis kon fekt' | To sterilize the piece of candy you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, somehow assuming this will "remove" all the germs. |
| DOOR SLINKY | dor slin' kee | The springy device attached to the back of the door that prevents the door from marring the wall. |
| DUBLECTATE | duh blek' tayt | To misplace one's eyeglasses and eventually discover them atop one's head. |
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| ECNALUBMA | ek na lub' ma | A resue vehicle which can only be seen in the rear-view mirror. |
| ELBONICS | el bon' iks | The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater. |
| ELECELLERATION | el a cel er ay' shun | The mistaken notion that the more you press an elevator button the faster it will arrive. |
| EQUATT | e' kwat | The pastime of trying to balance the light switch in the exact middle of the wall plate, so that the light is half on, half off. |
| ERDU | uhr' dew | The leftover accumulation of rubber particles after erasing a mistake on a test paper. |
| ESCALASTICIZE | esk a last' i size | To lean against the rail of a moving escalator and have the sensation of being pulled in opposite directions. |
| EUNEEBLIC | you nee' blik | A person who refuses to believe an "out of order" sign and risks his money anyway. |
| EXPRESSHOLES | eks pres' holz | People who try to sneak more that the "eight items or less" into the express checkout line. |
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| FENDERBERG | fen' dur burg | The large glacial deposits that form on the insides of car fenders during snowstorms. |
| FLANNISTER | flan' is tur | The plastic yoke that holds a six-pack of beer together. |
| FLEN | flen | (chemical symbol: Fl) The black crusty residue that accumulates on the necks of old catsup bottles. |
| FLEPTIC | flep' tik | The tendency of soup and dog food lids to slip into the can upon opening. |
| FLIRR | flur | A photograph that features the camera operator's finger in the corner. |
| FLOLES | flolz | The extra (fourth and fifth) holes in notebook paper. Created in the hopes that one day man kind will perfect a "five ring binder." |
| FLOPCORN | flop' korn | The unpopped kernels at the bottom of the cooker. |
| FLOTION | flo' shun | The tendency when sharing a waterbed to undulate for five minutes every time the other person moves. |
| FLOTTA FACTOR | flah' ta fak' tur | The porven scientific fact that at a self-service pump, the last ten cents take longer to reach the tank than the first twelve dollars' worth. |
| FLOWFRIGHT | flo' frite | The desperate attempt by a homeowner to "talk" his overflowing toilet into backing down. |
| FLUGGLING | flug' ul ling | The dangerous practice, in a darkened room, of using one's finger to guide the end of an electrical plug into a wall socket. |
| FRAZNIT | frahs' nit | Any string hanging from an article of clothing which when pulled causes the article to completely unravel. |
| FRUST | frust | The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room unil he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug. |
| FURBLING | fer' bling | Having to wander through a maze of ropes at an airport or bank even when you are the only person in line. |
| FURNIDENTS | fer' nih dents | The indentations that appear in carpets after a piece of furniture has been removed. |
| FURTERUS ZONE | fer ter' us zohn | The empty stretches of bun on either end of a hot dog. |
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| GARMITES | gar' mitz | Those items of clothing that fit perfectly in the store, but somehow shrink on the way home. |
| GENDERPLEX | jen' dur pleks | The predicament of a person in a theme restaurant who is unable to determine his or her designated bathroom (e.g., turtles and tortoises). |
| GERTATIOUS | gur tay' shus | Having the adolescent fear that hanging one's arm over the bed at night will mean being dragged under. |
| GIMPLEXUS | gim plek' sis | Rear area of thighs, which must be peeled from car seat on hot summer days. |
| GLACKETT | glak' it | The noisy ball inside a spray-paint can. |
| GLADHANDLING | glad' han dling | To attempt, with frustration results, to find and separate the ends of a plastic-sandwich or trash bag. |
| GLANTICS | glan' tiks | Two people, who, while making out, open their eyes at the same time to see if the other is looking. |
| GLARPO | glar' po | The juncture of the ear and skull where pencils are stored. |
| GLEEMULE | glee' mule | (a unit of measure) One unit of toothpaste, measured from bristle to bristle. (Not to be confused with GLEEMITES, which ar petrified deposits of toothpaste found in sinks.) |
| GLUTETIC CHAIR | glew tet' ik chair | A twentieth-cnetury design of chair, found most often in movie theaters. The main feature of the Glutetic chair is its ability to keep folding up underneath a person as he tries to force it down with his butt. |
| GNARMBLUM | narm' blum | The dry wrinkly area at the end of the elbow. |
| GRACKLES | grak' elz | The wrinkles that appear on the body after staying in water too long. |
| GREELITE | gree' lite | The eerie glow that emanates from beneath escalator steps. |
| GRINION | grin' yun | The unsightly indentation in the middle of a belt when it has been worn too long. |
| GRIPTION | grip. shun | The sound of sneakers squeaking against the floor during basketball games. |
| GRISKNOB | gris' nahb | The end of a chicken drumstick which always gives the appearance of having more chicken on it. |
| GROMAXES | grom' ack sis | Inside area of knees uses to grip steering wheel when holding a road map. |
| GURMLISH | gurm' lish | The red warning flag at the top of a club sandwich toothpick which prevents the person from biting into it and puncturing the roof of his mouth. |
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| HANGLE | han' gul | A cluster of coat hangers. |
| HEMPENNANT | hem' pen ent | Any coattail, cuff, or dress hem dangling outside the door of a moving vehicle. |
| HOZONE | ho' zohn | The place where one sock in every laundry load disappears to. |
| HUDNUT | hud' nut | The bolt left over when one has finished reassembling a bicycle or car engine. |
| HYDRALATION | hi dra lay' shun | Acclimating oneself to a cold swimming pool by bodily regions: toe-to-knee, knee-to-waist, waist-to-elbow, elbow-to-neck. |
| HYSTIOBLOGINATION | his' te o blahg in ay' shun | The act of trying to identify a gift by holding it to your ear and shaking it. |
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| IDIOT BOX | id' e ot bahks | The part of the envelope that tells a person where to place the stamp when they can't quite figure it out for themselves. |
| IGNISECOND | ig' ni sek und | The overlapping moment of time when the hand is locking the car door even as the brain is saying "my keys are in there!" |
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| JIFFYLUST | ji' phee lust | The inability to be the first person to carve into a brand-new beautiful jar of peanut butter. |
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| KEDOPHOBIA | ked oh fo' be uh | The fear of having one's sneakers eaten by the teeth on the escalator. |
| KNIMPEL | nim' pul | The missing last piece of a jigsaw puzzle. |
| KROGT | kraht | (chemical symbol: Kr) The metallic silver coating found on fast-food game cards. |
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| LACTOMANGULATION | lak' to man gyu lay' shun | Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk carton so badly that one has to resort to using the "illegal" side. |
| LAMINITES | lam' in itz | Those strange people who show up in the photo sections of brand-new wallets. |
| LOTSHOCK | laht' shahk | The act of parking your car, walking away, and then watching it roll past you. |
| LUB | lub | The small deposit of spinach that lodges itself between one's teeth. |
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| McMONIA | muk moan' ee uh | (chemical symbol: Mc) Noxious gas created by fast-food employee mopping under your table while you're eating. |
| MAGGIT | mag' it | Any of the hundreds of subscription cards that fall from the pages of a magazine (pl. MAGGREGATE) |
| MAGNIPHOBIA | pag ni fo' be uh | The fear that the object in the side mirror is much much closer that it appears. |
| MANGLAZETTE | mang la zet' | The newspaper at the top of the stack that everyone passes over, believing the ones beneath it have better or fresher news. |
| MARP | marp | The impossible-to-find beginning of a roll of cellophane tape. |
| MATTRESCOTTING | mat' res kot ing | The pattern of gray and white lines on an institutional mattress. |
| MAYPOP | may' pahp | A bald tire. |
| MEMNANTS | mem' nents | The chipped or broken M & M's at the bottom of the bag. |
| MERFERATOR | mur' fur ay ter | The cardboard core in a toilet tissue roll. |
| METHYLPHOBIA | meth il fo' ce uh | The fear that you are coing to have to pay for the one cent you over-pumped at the self-service station. |
| MITTSQUINTER | mit' skwint ur | A ballplayer who looks into his glove after missing the ball, as if, somehow, the cause of the error lies there. |
| MOPHENES | mo' feenz | The semi-truck headlights that invade your motel room at 3 AM. |
| MOTSPUR | mot' sper | The pesky fourth wheel on a shopping cart that refuses to cooperate with the other three. |
| MOWMUFFINS | mo' muh finz | The dried accumulation of grass on the underside of lawnmowers. |
| MUMPHREYS | mum' freez | The water that comes out of the initial squirts of a squeeze mustard bottle. |
| MUSTGO | must' go | Any item of food that has been sitting in the refrigerator so long it has become a science project. |
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| NAPJERK | nap' jurk | The sudden convulsion of the body just as one is about to doze off. |
| NARCOLEPULACY | mar ko lep' ul ah see | The contagious action of yawning, causing everyone else in sight to also yawn. |
| NEGLINTICS | ne glin' tiks | The study of why dark lint attaches itself to light clothing and vice versa. |
| NEONPHANCY | ne on' fan see | A fluorescent light bulb struggling to come to life. |
| NERKLE | nur' kel | A person who leaves his Christmas lights up all year. |
| NEVITTS | nev' itz | The sandpaper-like deposits on a cat's tongue. |
| NISTOLS | niz' tolz | The small rubbery pads on the bottom of a dog's paw. |
| NIZ | nitz | An annoying hair at the top of a movie screen. |
| NUGLOO | nug' lew | Single continuous eyebrow that covers entire forehead. |
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