Real signs on church property
- Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!
- Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins.
- Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!
- An ad for St. Joseph's Episcopal Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed & a headline that reads : "For fast, fast relief, take two tablets."
- When the restaurant next to the Lutheran Church put out a big sign with red letters that said, "Open Sundays." The church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open on Sundays, too."
- Have trouble sleeping? We have sermons--come hear one!
- A singing group called "The Resurrection" was scheduled to sing at a church. When a big snowstorm postponed the performance, the pastor fixed the outside sign to read, "The Resurrection is postponed."
- People are like tea bags-you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.
- God so loved the world that He did not send a committee.
- Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!
- When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out alright.
- Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday.
- Fight truth decay--study the Bible daily.
- How will you spend eternity--Smoking or Nonsmoking?
- Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives.
- Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.
- It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin.
- Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church.
- If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.
- If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again.
- Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.
- This is a CH_ _ CH. What is missing?" ---------> (U R)
- Forbidden fruit creates many jams.
- In the dark? Follow the Son.
- Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up.
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