Pickup Lines & Responses
Before I got married, I had my share of the "bar scene". While I was a stud about town, I wasn't very adept at working the bar scene. I don't really know why. At one point, I was juggling three girlfriends at once, that is until Sarah eliminated the competition. Funny how the other two ladies just vanished and no one has heard from them since. But I digress.
While I was the "stud muffin", back when I was single, the bar scene just wasn't my thing. I don't know why, I memorized all the great pick up lines, but I always struck out. Here is a list of my favorite pickup lines and the typical response I got from the woman:
- ME: Can I buy you a drink?
- SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.
- ME: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
- SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.
- ME: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
- SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.
- ME: How did you get to be so beautiful?
- SHE: I must've been given your share.
- ME: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
- SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.
- ME: Your face must turn a few heads.
- SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.
- ME: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
- ME: I think I could make you very happy.
- SHE: Why? Are you leaving?
- ME: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
- SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.
- ME: Can I have your name?
- SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?
- ME: Shall we go see a movie?
- SHE: I've already seen it.
- ME: Where have you been all my life?
- ME: Haven't I seen you some place before?
- SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.
- ME: Is this seat empty?
- SHE: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
- ME: So, what do you do for a living?
- SHE: I'm a female impersonator.
- ME: Hey baby, what's your sign?
- ME: Your body is like a temple.
- SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.
- ME: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
- SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
- ME: Where have you been all my life?
- SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life, in your wildest dreams.
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